So my husband said it was cheating to give up shopping after all I spent on Christmas and after receiving Christmas gifts. I still say it is a very hard thing for me to do. Just like Buddy the Elf says, “I love it, I love it, and I don’t care who knows it!” He was referring to being in love with a woman, but it still fits here. Growing up, shopping was what bonded my mother and myself, we would call it retail therapy. Whenever either of us were stressed from work, basketball, family, etc, we would call each other up and simply say we need some retail therapy. Both of our husbands now cringe at the mention of retail therapy, especially if the jeweler’s name is mentioned.
As you know, I can do a great job justifying a purchase. If I’m buying work clothes, I simple say it is an investment into my career. If it’s a toy for our dog, I say, “he may not be our entire lives, but we are his entire life.” Oh and we took sex away from him (when he got neutered), so he can be spoiled rotten in my book! If we used a coupon, we’d say, “Look how much money we saved.” Even I know that is a stretch. We might have saved $100 but we still spent $200. That $100 wasn’t given back to us to save.
So for January, I gave up shopping, and here is what I noticed:
Week 1: This is easy, easy as pie! Maybe getting all the Christmas gifts helped my small desire to shop. I loved looking at my budget and how little I spent. There was no stress over what to buy, fitting in a shopping trip on the way home, or dealing with the checkout lines. I thought…I can do this, and look how much I’m saving in time and money. Our next big financial goal is that much closer. I also thought how I will continue this for a few more months, check back in the spring to see how that is going….or not going…..
Week 2: No shopping when I visited my parents. My mother and I love going into town to shop at the small and unique stores whenever I visit. She was a little disappointed when I reminded her about my no shopping cleanse. Although my father and husband were ecstatic to say the least. I was a bit of a struggle not visiting our favorite shops, and supporting the town as I tell my husband, but it was nice to see how low my spending was for the week.
Week 3: My husband wanted a new pillow and his Keurig broke, so he asked if I could buy him new ones. Guess what my answer was….Nope, I am on my spending cleanse and cannot buy it. Nah nah nah nah nah nah! Finally justice to all of his mockery! It was totally worth it to say no to his requests after his jabs and jokes the week before. Sorry Eric, this might be an expensive month for you, but NOT for me!
Week 4: Uh oh lunch at the mall with my brother, sister-in-law, and adorable nephew. This can be bad news, I even need to return a dress. But I am going to be strong if not for myself but for you. I went straight into the restaurant and straight back to my car. So I know if I can do it, you can too. Whatever is your goal, it is worth more than another dress or another pair of shoes. It is all about prioritizing our wants and realizing what we are willing to give up to get the top wants on our list. So what is your goal or top want, and what are you willing to give up to get it?
It’s hard to figure out how much exactly I would of spent shopping, but I think it is safe to say at least $300. I am moving $300 more into savings after this month, so my total for the first two months is…drum roll please…$510.
I have heard from some ladies who took the 30 Day Spending Cleanse, and their results. It does work, one woman saved $65 by not buying coffee outside her house, which would be an extra $780 a year. There are two priceless items we are saving on as well, our time and our energy. By not shopping, I have more time to work, for my husband and dog, and more energy for them too. By not going to Starbucks every morning and afternoon, she probable saved 45 minutes a day, which can now be used for more productive tasks. If you cater that extra 3-4 hours a week to growing your business, you will earn more money. If you use the time for your family, you will have more memories together. So think big picture and take my challenge, my guess is you’ll gain some extra money and time! Sounds pretty good to me.
If you have great results, please share them with me by emailing Jessica.email@example.com.
Next month is no manicures or pedicures, better hurry up and get one in!
Jessica Weaver, CFP®, CDFA™, CFS®
Mindful Money Management, what on earth does that mean? Now what do I have to do with my money? Can’t I just close my eyes, and it be worth three times as much? If you know a secret and can do that, please let me know…you know where to find me! If you can’t do that, you might want to keep reading. Too many times we go through the everyday motions of life without really paying attention to what is going on around us. We earn our paycheck, pay our bills (hopefully on time), save some for retirement, and move onto the next paycheck. Repeat for 365 days, 52 weeks, 1 year, 5 years, and so on. Then one day we look up, and wonder how did I get here? Trust me, I’ve heard this hundreds of times.
Does this sound like you? It sounds like me that is for sure. I am absolutely, positively terrible at being in the present moment. I buy something, and think no problem my next paycheck will cover it. Then I think, when am I getting paid again? Uh oh not for another 10 days! Whoops, too late I already wore it.
I’ll be honest, this was me about a year ago. Before I started finding tools and exercises to help keep me present, to be mindful of my financial decisions, and to help open my eyes to the choices I really do have, but never thought I did. And what is great for you (if you are like me), is this is the perfect time of the year to try it too. Now I’m not saying what worked for me, will automatically work for you, but I am saying you deserve to find out if they might work. That they might make you happier, and BONUS, might make you get on track with your financial goals and stay on track.
So what I want you to do is think about what you love to avoid with your money or with your financial situation. Is it having a hard conversation with your spouse about money? Or maybe coming to grips with your debt, that your life-style might need some adjusting? Or how about saying no to your children because you don’t want to disappoint them? I get it, there are always things we want to avoid because they make us uncomfortable or maybe a little disappointed in ourselves or in our situation.
But it is time to open your eyes to it, and stop wishing it away or avoiding it like the plague! Stop paying your monthly bills late each month because you hate it. Stop avoiding your 401(k), and start saving for retirement, because one day you will want to retire or you might even be forced to. These things you like to avoid aren’t going away, sorry to burst a bubble on you. If you need me to take your hand through it, I can help, and luckily we have an event to get you started, Learn to Love the 3Ms; Mindful Money Management. Janet Matts, Principal, JBM LLC, and Executive Life Coach and I will be hosting a fun Valentine’s Day Event geared for women about being in the present moment on February 9th. I truly believe Janet knows what she is talking about since she helped transform my life from some of the tools she gave me.
Now if I haven’t convinced you to sign up yet, let me paint you a picture of a hypothetical case study about a single mom who woke up one day to a mountain of debt. She has two girls, and the father isn’t in the picture much. She works full time, as hard as she can to support her family, but the debt kept piling up. She had big dreams when she started her career, and never envisioned her life to be where it is today. Sure she loves her daughters, but the absentee father, the debt, and her limited paycheck were not part of her dream. She never thought about the repercussions of using her credit cards, of not saving for her daughters’ colleges, of not saving for retirement, and of always saying yes to her children’s wants. She just put her head down and continued onward, avoiding the mountain of debt piling up, the unpaid bills, and the non-existing emergency fund. And forget about a retirement plan, that wasn’t even in her deck of cards.
What happened after she woke up one day and finally said enough? Well after some much needed wine, she decided she needs to make a change. By utilizing the tools and exercises we will go over at our event, she started thinking before buying anything. With the help of these tools, she opened her eyes to the possibilities out there every day for her, to either earn more income, spend less money, and make the most of the savings she does have. Your situation might be different or not as severe, but you can make a decision for a change. Stop avoiding it, and sign up now.
It’s time to start making the most of your money today, so you can have the tomorrow you really want. It isn’t just going to happen for you, it requires the right tools, the right strategies, and the right mindset. So register today to get started, we can’t wait to help give you the essential methods to start living for today.
Click below to get the information and to register:
To get you started here is a great mindful exercise to try:
"From time to time, notice your breathing. Notice your posture.
Notice the length of your spine.
Notice the points of contact between your body and the chair, floor, ground.
Notice your clothes touching your body.
Notice the sounds around you.
Notice the nearest sound you can hear.
Notice the furthest away sound you can hear.
Now notice your breathing again."
Jessica Weaver, CFP®, CDFA™, CFS®
Any opinions are of Jessica Weaver and not necessarily those of Raymond James. The above is a hypothetical example for illustration purposes only.
Raymond James is not affiliated with Janet Matts, Principal, JBM, LLC and Executive Life Coach.
WARNING: This posting is for women about to start the divorce process, are currently going through a divorce, or are recently divorced. If you know someone who is getting a divorce, please forward to them immediately, they will thank you profusely for it.
The divorce process can be just so... overwhelming/exhausting/frustrating/long/emotional/fill in your adjective here. Just when you think you’ve done the hard part and admitted you are getting divorced, you are slammed with even more emotions, frustrations from your soon to be ex, homework from your attorneys and other professionals, and oh yea…everyday life. The light at the end of the tunnel seems to be turned off, and you are thinking how on earth am I going to get through this and survive? I can barely make it through a day without breaking down and crying/cursing/wanting to crawl back in bed.
And you feel alone, so utterly alone. Everyone wants to give you their two cents, but none of them really know what you are going through. Everyone is an “expert” and gives advice because their sister went through a divorce, their neighbor got the marital home in her divorce, and their cousin got $10,000 in alimony. Yes, we’ve heard it all, and everyone is talking at you but no one is listening to you. It’s amazing how we can feel so alone while everyone is there talking. But like I said, they are giving advice, insights, and past experiences, but none of it applies to you because they aren’t hearing you.
Oh and one more thing, you have no idea where to start…to start to feel normal again, to start to get your money back on track, to start a new life, or to start the divorce process. So you feel alone, overwhelmed and confused, with no idea what to do. After speaking with hundreds of women (divorcing, divorced, and divorce professionals) and helping dozens of women get through a divorce, I’ve decided enough was enough. Enough women feel this way, and because of this, I wanted to create a breakthrough divorce workshop, Divorced and Alive Again. Our first workshop is on February 11th from 9 a.m. to 12 p.m., at Foran Financial Group, 54 Grove Street Suite 2A Somerville, NJ 08876. There will be a panel of divorce professionals including the following:
To get you started, here are my Do’s and Don’ts of Divorce:
Jesssica Weaver, CFP®, CDFA™, CFS®
Raymond James is not affiliated with and does not endorse the opinions or services of Joan Geiger, Susan Friedman, William Lemega, or the organizations they represent. Any opinions are those of Jessica Weaver and not necessarily those of RJFS or Raymond James.
“My entire life can be described in one sentence: It didn’t go as planned, and that’s ok.”-Rachel Wolchin
Would you say this describes 2015 for you? Or maybe the last 20 years? As the quote says, we can plan all we want, but it might not go the way we planned. So what is the point of planning? Why spend all the time to get a strategy in place when it can all fly out the window when your boss says NO to your great new idea, your children get sick the day of your interview, or the stock markets didn’t go the direction you thought. Last year, the stock market was off to its worse start ever, which is NOT what most investors were planning on. The picture below is the face of most stock traders last January.
We had the worst 10 day start to a calendar year! The S&P 500 lost $1.41 trillion in value within these first 10 trading days of the year . Some of the best stock traders say: it’s your reaction to the news that matters most. And the same can be said for life, how will you react to life’s curveball thrown at you today or tomorrow? Will you sit there and complain or will you take one step forward and embrace the change? Even if you need to tiptoe that step, at least you are moving towards a new solution.
Since life never seems to go as planned, we always need to keep the momentum going and react positively. It is a New Year, and you get to decide if 2017 is the year you want to be happy, to live the life you want, and to embrace change. Let’s think of all the reasons for some change in your life. How about:
• To earn more money at work (dreaming of some extra $$$),
• To be at home more with your children,
• To feel financially secure with your emergency fund,
• Be more prepared if you lose your spouse (I know, it’s not something we want to think about, but we must),
• To enjoy going to work each day (wouldn’t that be well enjoyable),
• Be less stressed around your family,
• To fight less with your spouse (BONUS from not fighting, more time & energy for fun activities),
• Have more money & time to travel,
• To move on from your divorce in a positive direction,
• Or fill in your reason_________________________
Have I hit a nerve yet? What will be your reason to make 2017 the best year yet for yourself and for your family? Write down your reason for change, and write down what you want the result to be from that change. It is going to be more than just the action of the change, it will go deeper and affect you more than you think. My reason for change is to help more women with their money and with their financial situation. Obviously it goes much further than just helping more women. I want more women to feel confident with their finances and with their financial decisions. I want them to feel secure and comfortable for their family’s sake.
Every woman should understand the consequences of her financial decisions. They should have a knowledge of how investments and the financial planning process works, and more importantly, how it works for them personally. I’ve seen too many women feel they don’t have a voice or say in their family’s finances because they didn’t know what was going on or what it all meant. So let me help you too. All you have to do is click below to schedule a discovery call to get a strategy in place to help you reach your financial goals this year and to help create a better life for you and your family.
Please don’t be one of the statistics, you know the one where only 45% of us actually make a resolution. And then of that 45%, a mere 8% succeed with their goal. It doesn’t leave a lot of room for accomplishments, does it? So what is your resolution, and what is your reason for your change? Knowing these two answers will help you stay on track and beat the 92% odds of not making it. There will be no obligations to work with me from the call, I only want to help uncover your reasons for change and how to make 2017 your year to achieve this change. My sole purpose of the call is to provide you with as much information and insight as possible. To help jumpstart your year, the call will be FREE. Don’t continue down the same path as you did last year, or say you’ll finally commit to a resolution only to give up before January ends. Click below to schedule a call and get your life moving in the direction you really want, not the life you settle for.
And now for some inspiration, here are the Top 10 New Year’s Resolutions from 2015:
1. Lose weight,
2. Getting organized,
3. Spend less, save more (I know someone who can help with this… ME),
4. Enjoy life to the fullest,
5. Staying fit and healthy,
6. Learn something exciting (maybe something in this posting?),
7. Quit smoking,
8. Help others in their dreams (YES please, sign me up!),
9. Fall in love, and …….. drum roll……..
10. Spend more time with family
So what will yours be? Click below to find out.
Happy New Year!
Jessica Weaver, CFP®, CDFA™, CFS®
The S&P 500 is an unmanaged index of 500 widely held stocks that is generally considered representative of the U.S. stock market. Keep in mind that individuals cannot invest directly in any index.