We talk a lot about what happens when life happens and your plan gets thrown out the window. All the goals, the dreams, and hours spent thinking about your future, completely worthless now. But what do you do? If you’ve read my book: Strong Woman Stronger Assets, you might remember a chapter just on your reactions. 10% of your life is planning and 90% of it is reacting, so your reaction is everything in the end. Isn’t it?
You can take the crappy circumstance thrown at you and let it dictate the next chapter of your life or you can be at peace with it and move on! So what will it be? Stay stuck or move on to bigger and better goals.
This reactive mindset mentality was brought up during a meeting with a new woman, who was recently widowed. She had some amazing advice that I knew I needed to share with others, and it can be used in any instance where your world is shaken up. Her 2 rules were:
There is never a handbook on how to deal with grief because everyone deals with it differently. It is about finding what works for you. And everyone’s situation is different, so what worked for your sister won’t work for you. But to try and help, here is a few tips to get you started to put your financial life back in order after a death.
You might have noticed a trend with my tips, and my best advice is to take advantage of others to help. Embrace your family and friends during this time to either be there to simply listen to you or bring over pizza and a bottle of wine. And utilize the professionals instead of trying to do it on your own. Deaths are hard enough without having to deal with a financial mess on top of it. Even a simple estate can take over a year to close, so bring in the big guns. And it makes sure you aren’t missing a thing!
Here I will make it simple: call an estate attorney, accountant, advisor, and possibly a therapist when needed. Don’t know any, let’s talk.
Jessica Weaver, CFP®, CDFA™, CFS®
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